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Adventures in Vermicomposting!

November 22, 2010

Here are a few tips on how to vermicompost without getting so frustrated you beg your friends and relations to take them away to their own kitchens (because they won’t, and you can’t set this kind of worm free in your yard):

1. Look up vermicomposting first. Do not believe everything you read.

2. Don’t leave worms in front of an air conditioning vent. They will dry up and die. It is very sad.

3. Avoid adding fruit or you will be the proud owner of 43,651,784 fruit flies.

4. Appreciate the grossness of rotting food, since the worms are actually eating the micro-organisms that break down the veggies. Stick your hand right in there to bury the kitchen scraps. No, Champ, don’t use a spoon. It’s not like it’s POOP or anything.

5. Do not think you can put the bin outside for the summer or you will be feeding a skwatrillion ants. You will have to pick out all your wormies, empty the bin, and start over. It will be a pain.

6. Don’t think you’ll be getting loads of dirt anytime soon. It’s worm poop. Teeny weeny tiny poopies.

7. Don’t add squash seeds. Seeds do not compost well. They sprout. Observe:

8. Sometimes you will need to be hopeful and think the worms have merely gone on vacation, and are not all dead.

9. Marvel!!! at how much kitchen stuffs you put in and how it all seems to disappear down into practically nothing at all. Truly this is WORM MAGIC!

10. Be proud! Tell people you have pet worms! Hear the ringing silence that follows.

And now, my friends and worms if you can read, I can safely say that after learning these 10 tips on vermicomposting I am truly, honestly, a happy worm owner. Mother. Worm mother. Wormer? Wormwoman. I like these worms now! It took a while, but I’m enjoying their hard work and the fact that I don’t have to change their litter box since they live IN the litter box.

Special thanks to my children who have both at one time or another asked me to kiss a worm they’ve found in the garden. And because I love my children and want them to love all of God’s creatures, I have kissed worms. Perhaps without those experiences I would have never allowed a bin of worms to live in my kitchen.

10 Comments leave one →
  1. Allumer permalink
    November 22, 2010 11:34 am

    I am laughing. SO. HARD.

    I have really wanted a worm bin. The Man really DOESN’T want a worm bin. And since the worm bin would probably go in his domain, we’ve been having a semi-epic struggle over it. His main concern is that it would smell, but I’ve heard it doesn’t. But does it? The burning question here is: Is yo house funky, Maryam? Worm Mother?

  2. November 22, 2010 12:22 pm

    LOL no, it has no smell at all, i swear. it’ll probably smell if you add too much food for the amount of worms you got (i started with about 12 worms, but they recommend a pound!), but you can start slow and see how fast they go through the scraps. i’d say the flies are the biggest pain, but once you figure out how to not have flies, it’s not so bad. burying the food matters to avoid flies, and not adding fruit, in my opinion, does a lot. don’t let the Man watch that documentary about No-Impact Man because there’s a heartbreaking moment when he comes home to his tiny apartment and it’s infested with flies. No-Impact Man is very disheartened.

    the tank of crickets, however, does smell. the scintillating scent of rotting cricket carcasses.

    • Allumer permalink
      November 22, 2010 12:41 pm

      Heh, I already watched No Impact Man doc, but he bailed around the time the wife came home having spend 10K on shoes – was that about 5 minutes into the film? The excess was more than he could bear!

      I’m definitely going to look into this – but I’ll pass on the crickets! Thanks, Maryam.

      • November 22, 2010 1:23 pm

        LOL i can see him bailing, it was a bit much. i guess it’s so far out of my realm or lifestyle to spend that much on shoes or anything really, i was shocked. i know it’s some people’s normal, though. anyway, good thing he didn’t get to the fly haven bit!

        oh the crickets are here to feed the geckos. we bought the crickets from the pet store and some were already dead, hence the stench. normally they’re a looooooovely pet!

  3. November 22, 2010 12:25 pm

    you are more than welcome to come give mine a whiff and report back to him 🙂

  4. November 24, 2010 11:34 am

    I had a recent problem with ants! Thousands of them! Most of them were on the cover though, so I just removed that. As for the bin itself, I poured a couple of glasses of water to discourage the worms from staying. It has a drain so I don’t really think any worms will drown. Besides, they can stay at the upper portions of the bin if its too wet.

  5. November 28, 2010 7:51 pm

    Did I say this post cracked me up? It cracked me up!

    I’ve always wondered how the worms thing worked – I have vague memories of an old episode of Blue Peter (I can’t explain Blue Peter, you’ll have to consult YouTube) and tiger worms or something, but we kind of just toss biodegradable waste in the garden and let it compost naturally. I think it works. It must be said I am not certain XD

    But then, I am not a garden person.

  6. November 28, 2010 8:58 pm

    chris, i’m loving the compost pictures on your blog! (never thought i’d say that, but people change.)

    saya, tossing things in the dirt definitely works! i just don’t want my neighbors to blame us if they start seeing more critters ’round here. do you get raccoons or possums? or… rats?

    • November 29, 2010 6:58 am

      I know what you mean. If you told me five years ago that I’d be culturing worms, I’d call you crazy! And here I am now!

  7. November 28, 2010 11:57 pm

    Hah! We have a 6-foot wall and I live in the inner city.* I don’t even know what a possum is, when I think about it seriously! And I think raccoons are like, an endangered species in my area…no, a legendary animal, a CARTOON. We do have foxes, though – scrawny sad foxes 😦 – but they can’t get into our garden.

    Run with us, we are free…

    PS If I knew why the embedding wasn’t working, I’d fix it. But I don’t, so I can’t.

    * For about another ten days. : (

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