Adventures in Vermicomposting!
Here are a few tips on how to vermicompost without getting so frustrated you beg your friends and relations to take them away to their own kitchens (because they won’t, and you can’t set this kind of worm free in your yard):
1. Look up vermicomposting first. Do not believe everything you read.
2. Don’t leave worms in front of an air conditioning vent. They will dry up and die. It is very sad.
3. Avoid adding fruit or you will be the proud owner of 43,651,784 fruit flies.
4. Appreciate the grossness of rotting food, since the worms are actually eating the micro-organisms that break down the veggies. Stick your hand right in there to bury the kitchen scraps. No, Champ, don’t use a spoon. It’s not like it’s POOP or anything.
5. Do not think you can put the bin outside for the summer or you will be feeding a skwatrillion ants. You will have to pick out all your wormies, empty the bin, and start over. It will be a pain.
6. Don’t think you’ll be getting loads of dirt anytime soon. It’s worm poop. Teeny weeny tiny poopies.
7. Don’t add squash seeds. Seeds do not compost well. They sprout. Observe:
8. Sometimes you will need to be hopeful and think the worms have merely gone on vacation, and are not all dead.
9. Marvel!!! at how much kitchen stuffs you put in and how it all seems to disappear down into practically nothing at all. Truly this is WORM MAGIC!
10. Be proud! Tell people you have pet worms! Hear the ringing silence that follows.
And now, my friends and worms if you can read, I can safely say that after learning these 10 tips on vermicomposting I am truly, honestly, a happy worm owner. Mother. Worm mother. Wormer? Wormwoman. I like these worms now! It took a while, but I’m enjoying their hard work and the fact that I don’t have to change their litter box since they live IN the litter box.
Special thanks to my children who have both at one time or another asked me to kiss a worm they’ve found in the garden. And because I love my children and want them to love all of God’s creatures, I have kissed worms. Perhaps without those experiences I would have never allowed a bin of worms to live in my kitchen.