What’s The Date Today?
For the easily pleased (and who isn’t?), today’s date may be making you have little squees of pleasure every time you think it. Well, okay…maybe not for, you know, most people who may find squeeing undignified and generally reprehensible behaviour for any self-respecting human being with an iota of decorum. But still – the date is cool, right? 10/10/10 AND we agree on it on both sides of the pond (unlike 07/08/09).
On Facebook, someone’s status reads, ‘today’s date makes me want to come up with a whole bunch of Top 10 lists’. So I thought…why not? Even though I’m condemned* to my cave of studyblah, I couldn’t resist. Although I should have.
This is the kind of post that happens when you’ve been to too many weddings, have a headache, have a lot of work to procrastinate on and have a camera rather too close to hand. And the cable. Because usually, of course, one can’t find the cable without upending twelve different pots and interrogating every family member at hand. So: here is a list of ten things that are (or are not) helping me (not) study:
1) Super Lemons!!
Kai sent me these! All the way from Utah (via Berkeley, via Japan…wait, does that make sense?)! They are crazy sour. Crazy. And then they get really sweet. I gave one to my brother. One. No more. Boys eat too many sweets. Also, my brother is annoying. He is, even now, singing an annoying song. The other day, he pulled a Crane (yeah, that Karate Kid move) and tried to flatten me. Then there was that time I tried to sit on him to squash him to death and he just flipped me over like a burger on a barbecue.
Gone are the days when I could hurt him (and didn’t). Sigh. All good things must, apparently, come to an end.
I have allergies. Well, one allergy that requires the service of tissue. A lot of tissue. Also, the weather is so up-and-down that my body can’t figure it out yet, so we’re all a little coughy around here.
I need light. Otherwise I can’t see my keyboard and also it makes me wilt because I am a delicate photosynthetic flower of light and subtle fragrance. I stole this lamp from my brother. I told him he could have it back in three weeks.
Who doesn’t love pencils? Pencils are one of the twelve kinds of happiness. It isn’t actually ACTIVELY helping me study. But it makes my life better just by existing, sitting on my papers and smiling at me.
I need hydration. It keeps me beautiful my skin happy.
6) Terry Pratchett
He is Not Helping. I want to read it but I am Not Allowed. Mr Nutt, you will have to wait. So many books, so not allowed! Yet. But come three weeks, and I am COMING FOR YOU, Darian Frey, Tiffany Aching and all you other chaps. Thank you for being so patient.
7) Dental Floss
This is just on my desk for no reason that I can explain. So are a lot of things. Like a ring that doesn’t belong to me, a ring that does, a thingy of wooden cubes you can fiddle with a lot, a badge saying ‘a good pun is its own reword’, a wooden clothes peg and a few rubber bands, some cotton wool, a piece of paper with Janine’s phone number (who’s Janine?), an X-Factor pencil case in the shape of a microphone but without any pencils in it (my brother gave it to me), a Savlon antiseptic spray – I really don’t know why that is here. It doesn’t belong here. It belongs…somewhere else. I don’t actually know where. There is also wrapping paper. Why is there wrapping paper? It’s neither one Eid nor the other, there should be no wrapping paper.
8 ) Adolescent Coping Scale Manual
Trust me, you ALWAYS need the manual, otherwise you have no idea what is going on. Neither do the adolescents in question. Ideally, you can shove all the adolescents in a can and let them…adolesce. Which is a little like convalescing except almost decidedly the reverse. All in keeping with the adolescent psyche.
9) STATISTICS without MATHS
10) They’re not Terry’s, they’re MINE, mmm nom nom
Do not let this fool you. It is an empty box. Because we’ve already eaten it all. I say ‘we’. I mean ‘we’. Not ‘I’.
I know I said this was a list of ten, but you get a bonus:
11) MEN’S STRENGTH.
Because who doesn’t need a little men’s strength? I could sure do with some. Specifically the strength of his (or anyone’s, really) brain, because my one thinks Autumn (or anytime, really) is time to start hibernating. I could also do with being carried to bed, and a man’d have to be pretty darn strong to carry me anywhere.
What helps you (not) to study or work?
* By which I mean ‘I decided it was necessary to condemn myself’, for the significant reason that I have a Master’s dissertation due in less than three weeks, and if I pretend this blog doesn’t exist, I have a chance of getting it done, insha-Allah.