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The Fruits of Desperation?

April 6, 2010

Taken from a piece of intellectual rubbish masquerading as a newspaper, no wonder it’s free; too bad Londoners don’t recognise the cheap tactics being used to generally clutter up their consciousness and fill their heads with rubbish the London Lite, dated Thursday 1 October 2009:

‘Tantric master’ runs for Tories

A nightclub owner and self-proclaimed “tantric master” called Dr Earth has been selected by the Tories to contest the Edmonton seat.  Andrew Charalambous, 42, who claims ‘all you have to do is dance to save the world’, runs club nights using a hi-tech floor that generates electricity from the movement of dancers.  A fruitarian, he is also a barrister and volunteer police officer, and has a PhD.

My immediate thoughts:

1. Instant misgivings of anyone who simultaneously holds a PhD and the label ‘frutarian’ (I really hope it’s not a PhD in Nutrition)

2. The thesis that dancing will somehow save the world

3. Tory

4. Barrister

4. General suspicion of self-awarded titles containing the word ‘master’ (I make an exception for Master of Fail here)

5. Tory

6. If Dr Earth is not his real name, he loses all conceivable pixie points by default.  And his real name is <i>not</i> Dr Earth… so he loses all conceivable pixie points by default.

7. Mind-boggling paradox of Tantric Toryism (perhaps a new species of Bad hairdayus?)

8. For some reason our silly Tory mayor Boris springs to mind…

… And my personal dislike of dance clubs (they kill the spirit of dance) may or may not have anything to do with the general sentiment of OMWTHGTH.

7 Comments leave one →
  1. April 7, 2010 12:44 pm

    i… don’t… know… what… to… say…

    • April 7, 2010 12:48 pm

      When faced by Boris and the like, one rarely does.

      It’s a case of ‘you fail so hard that words fail me’ XD

  2. fjafjan permalink
    April 7, 2010 1:11 pm

    I am pretty sure “Frutarian” means he only eats fruit, or so says wikipedia I also first thought he was a Barrista rather than a Barrister and I was … perplexed.

    His real name is Andrew Charalambous and honestly he has enough stupid policies on his wiki page alone to criticize, but he doesn’t seem to be an all over reprehensible individual, just a Tory, with all the dumbness that implies.

    • April 7, 2010 1:13 pm

      Not sure being a barista qualifies you to be a barrister XD

      Also, I think it’s the dodgy policies that are being questioned here, not his personality. Although I fully believe people with reprehensible personalities should just Go Away. XD

  3. Richard permalink
    April 7, 2010 2:16 pm

    If everyone spent all their time dancing, the world probably would be a better place. It would also have a hell of a lot less amenities though.

    Also, those free papers (R.I.P.) really only worked on the basis that they were less depressing than looking out of the bus window when travelling through most parts of the capital.

    • Levantine permalink
      April 7, 2010 2:23 pm

      Yes, I quite like amenities >_>

      I tend to read books on buses ; ) Sometimes the only chance I get to read fiction these days… Even so, I still find looking out at London not so bad as reading sleazy gossip about some celebrity or other >_<

  4. April 8, 2010 2:46 am

    As someone who plans to make her living studying, in part, tantra (which originated with south Asian Buddhism and Hinduism), can I just object to this dude labeling himself as a tantric master?

    I shall leave the PhD and fruitarian objections to the rest of you 😀

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